How to Stop Worrying and Start Living

by Dale Carnegie

Book summary

“How to Stop Worrying and Start Living”, if you could only get one book, get this one! This is a fantastic book that talks about how to overcome anxiety and worry and live a happier life. It offers practical advice on steps you can take daily to manage stress, overcome fear and develop a positive outlook on life.  

I’d suggest to buy this book and “How to Win Friends and Influence People” by the same author. Another book that should totally be read is “Don’t sweat the small stuff and it’s all small stuff” by Richard Carlson. These are gems, we all should keep and study them.

It’s very hard to do a summary of this amazing book. So I have taken the summarized version offered by the author at the end of each section of the book.  Hope you love it and use it on a daily basis.

How to Stop Worrying and Start Living

Part One. Fundamentals facts you should know about worry

• RULE 1: Live in “day-tight compartments.” Don’t stew about the future. Just live each day until bedtime.
• RULE 2: When faced with trouble try the following steps:
  • Ask yourself, “What is the worst that can possibly happen if I can’t solve my problem?”
  • Prepare yourself mentally to accept the worst-if necessary.
  • Then calmly try to improve upon the worst-which you have already mentally agreed to accept.
• RULE 3: Remind yourself of the price you can pay for worry in terms of your health. “Those who do not know how to fight worry die young.”

Part Two. Basic techniques in analyzing worry

• RULE 1: Get the facts. 
• RULE 2: After carefully weighing all the facts, come to a decision.
• RULE 3: Once a decision is carefully reached, act! Get busy carrying out your decision and dismiss all anxiety about the outcome.
• RULE 4: When you are tempted to worry about a problem, work on the following questions:
  • What is the problem?
  • What is the cause of the problem?
  • What are all possible solutions?
  • What is the best solution?

Part Three. How to brake the Worry habit before it breaks you

• RULE 1: Crowd worry out of your mind by keeping busy. Plenty of action is one of the best therapies for worry.
• RULE 2: Don’t fuss about trifles. Don’t permit little things to ruin your happiness.
• RULE 3: Use the law of averages to outlaw your worries. Ask yourself: “What are the odds against this thing’s happening at all?”
• RULE 4: Co-operate with the inevitable. If you know something is beyond your control, let it be.
• RULE 5: Put a “stop-loss” order on your worries. Decide just how much anxiety a thing may be worth- and refuse to give it any more.
• RULE 6: Let the past bury its dead. Don’t saw sawdust.

Part Four. Seven ways to cultivate a mental attitude that will bring you peace and happiness

• RULE 1: Let’s fill our minds with thoughts of peace, courage, health, and hope, for “our life is what our thoughts make it.“
• RULE 2: Let’s never try to get even with our enemies. Let’s do as General Eisenhower does: let’s never waste a minute thinking about people we don’t like.
• RULE 3: 
  • Instead of worrying about ingratitude, let’s expect it. 
  • Let’s remember that the only way to find happiness is not to expect gratitude but to give for the joy of giving.
  • Let’s remember that gratitude is a “cultivated” trait; so if we want our children to be grateful, we must train them to be grateful.
• RULE 4: Count your blessings – not your troubles!
• RULE 5; Let’s not imitate others. Let’s find ourselves and be ourselves, for “envy is ignorance” and “imitation is suicide.”
• RULE 6: When fate hands us a lemon, let’s try to make a lemonade.
• RULE 7: Let’s forget our own unhappiness- by trying to create a little happiness for others. “When you are good to others, you are best to yourself.“